Friday, January 16, 2009

BEST of Both WORLDS

Why do women want the Best of Both Worlds? Why do they want to have their cake and eat it to? I’ve already came to the conclusion that women don’t ever know what they really want and seem to can’t ever make up their mind on what kind of relationship they want with certain men. Since this is “A REAL MAN’S WORLD”, your gonna hear what I think about this permanent state of confusion women always seem to have.

It seems as though girls always have those male friends that they know like them and that constantly try to get at them but they don’t ever show the same type of affection back to them. The girl knows he’s a good guy, knows he will treat her right, is easy to talk to, and is even cute in her eyes; BUT for some reason she just doesn’t want him. It almost appears that the girl is flattered that there is a guy who likes them so much and is always there for them in their times of need. He is there for them when they are having family problems, personal problems, and despite the fact that he doesn’t want to hear about the other niggas that you talk to, he even listens to you talk about that and gives you advice about all your problems. It’s not like he doesn’t let you know he is feeling you, because he does; it’s the fact that a lot of girls take it for granted the GOOD MAN that wants to be their support system. So girls usually hit you with one of the lines like: “I see you like a brother” or “I feel like I can tell you anything, your such a good friend” or “ I don’t really see you that way” or “ You do you & I’ll do me” or even “ I can’t see myself talking to you like that right now, but I can see myself being with you in the future”. This is all shit NIGGAS DON’T WANNA HEAR, but out of respect for the girl, we say “I UNDERSTAND AND RESPECT YOUR DECISION”. So the girl starts talking to the next nigga and the guy FINALLY moves on from this girl who seems like his forbidden fruit and stops putting his love life on hold for a girl who doesn’t want him and he starts to try to get at a new girl. BUT WAIT, now he stops showing the girl so much attention because he’s working on something new and positive with this new girl. So you know what happens next right, the girl realizes that this guy who was always there for her is slowly fading away, so she uses the power she has to get him back because she still has that certain hold on him. She gives him hope that they will start talking because she doesn’t want another girl having him because she knows he built for the long run and it’s a possibility that he will be in a long-term relationship and give the next girl the treatment she’s suppose to be receiving from him. In the meanwhile though, she wants to continue to talk to other guys but doesn’t want him talking to another girl…she wants THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS. Women seem to want to go ahead and do them and fuck with these guys that they know are wrong for them, but at the same time have that safety valve in that guy they know will treat them right and that they have this unbreakable hold over. So what I am trying to say to women is: Don’t treat a guy like a yo-yo and bring him back everything you think he’s moving on, you can’t keep someone shelved or refrigerated and put them away and try to go back and get them when YOU are ready, and don’t give a guy a false hope that something will happen between ya’ll two because all he will end up doing is holding on and waiting. So ladies, if you have that guy friend who you know will treat you right, why wait on getting treated the way your suppose to be treated as a woman. Life is too short and nothing is guaranteed; it may be something tragic that happens, it may be something small, or he may just finally get fed up with you playing with his mind and move on. Trust me though, you don’t want to look back regretting anything and saying, “What If” or “I wish I would had talked to him”. SO DON’T PUT OFF THE THINGS YOU WANT TODAY UNTIL TOMORROW…signing out….

7 comments:

  1. wow. guess i'll be the first to comment

    haha, i dont really know how to respond because in a way that is so true.. however, not for every female (i don't think) some who think the "good guy" is better off as a friend (in my eyes) go for it and risks their friendship. ive been in a situation like that where either of us liked eachother, knew it, didn't physically state it until further on down the line .. then lowkey regreted not ever saying anything and wonder til this day how our present day (future to the past) would be like.. would we be where we are now or what..

    well i know for some its challenging to take that risk in the "good guy" (friend)..

    cant wait to read more!

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  2. hmm good point. ok so its a mans world, but don't forget, dudes are big cake eaters too. but since its RMW i'll comment accordingly. i'm feeling what randomness said and it brings about an interesting point. There's no rule book on how to recognize,acknowledge and treat a good man, some females just have it naturally, some need to learn how and some females will be like the ones described in the post who let the good pass them by.

    We discussed having your cake and eating it too the other day and it was cool, but as much of an issue as it is, it kinda is necessary in the love world. its that chance and that risk to fight for what you really want. HOWEVER some people get caught up and do that whole yo-yo thing. Like I said before, people can't be shelved...smh.

    The interesting part about it was there are those good guy friends that a female may just want to keep at that friend level. Some girls may be scared because they know a dude on a higher level then to take that level on a different route were relationship-type feelings are involved is a little risky. I guess that risk can be argued with "love is risky take a chance". It all depends on that person though...

    SCANDALOUS?

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  3. I totally agree 100% with this post. I think for women, a man who does everything in his power to get the attention of the girl HE likes, she will notice him, even befriend him and probably gain some attraction, but that's it. She was not seeking this guy out he was seeking her && it's somewhat is like you see those types as brothers. Idk what it is but us girls really don't know what we want. That is so fair to say, but those type of guys are push overs, or someone we can walk over & sometimes a girl will play a guy like that jus to see how strong he is, and if he does every single thing she asks him to do without even blinking an eye then he is rendered weak in her eyes. I don't know why it's like that but it is. It shows us that he doesn't havea backbone and that we can do whatever we please maybe even cheat on him and he would still be around. Like a sick puppy. No woman wants a man puppy when we can get the real thing.
    Nice guys are great & all, but I need one who is going to tell me no once in a while, one who doesn't let me push, pull and guide him everywhere . This was a very good post though ! 2 thumbs way way way up :)

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  4. No Disrespect but the post above is part of the reason I think good women can never find good men. In my personal opinion some females do do that however most females never have those intentions because they are afraid of getting lead on just as much as the next person. Don’t get me wrong no female wants a guy that is going to be a stalker and not have his own life but if the guy is there for her she may just start to like him, and if not it’s unlikely that he won't notice. However, personally I’m the type to tell him straight out to his face, if i'm not interested.

    As some others have mentioned…I think this is one of two situations….a case of “mistaken identity” or a “fear to fall”. In the case of mistaken identity maybe the female is trying her hardest to keep the friendship just a friendship but Mr. Safe’s hopes are up so he hears what he wants, and sees what he wants even though the female has said all she could to let him know the truth while trying not to hurt him. In this situation Mr. Safe should do his own thing because chances are, although he might be the greatest thing for her, she's not ready, and if it’s meant to be then it will work out for the best… one day. Fear to fall is a whole different situation though. Maybe the female knows that Mr. Safe is everything she wants, and yeah maybe guys do try to talk to her (but maybe not). So Mr. Safe does his thing (attempting not to get hurt), but he doesn’t stray too far from the female (in and out of her life when he pleases and helping out where he can) and the female (once again….attempting not to get hurt) does the same. The fear of falling comes into place because both people are fronting (playing it safe!) possibly because there is a lack of understanding or perhaps a discrepancy in the relationship that makes things difficult. Point Blank I don’t believe in the idea of Best of Both Worlds…. Either the female WANTS Mr. Safe/ Mr. Right or she DOSEN’T. “Mr. Safe” just needs to see what’s REALLY there and act accordingly so he doesn’t get hurt or so he can try to be apart of something that may be great.


    Good guy friends are very difficult things to handle as stated by randomness at its best, and men should try to be understanding if the situation allows. Oh… AND as you said Slayher, time IS a terrible thing to waste.

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  5. Wow! Once again I was lured in! And it's sad to say but this is definitely THE TRUTH! I've guilty of this quite a few times. Sometimes you grow an attachment to someone and just want them around but it sucks when they want more than you do. It's not fair to lead people on and I've learned that the hard way by hurtin' others which of course ended up hurtin' me. I know what I have to do now after readin' this. There's this guy and he's great and I know he would do nothin' but make my life better if he was my man. But the physical attraction for me isn't there. So I guess I have to.....

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  6. what about when it's the other way... you mentioned nothing about the guys who do that to females and although it is rare, it does happen. She's thinking, "yes, this is the one!" She puts her complete trust in their friendship and relationship and he hits her with some lame excuse once he's finally gotten her like "I'm just not ready for that right now." or giving her the cold shoulder because "he just had a lot going on." when in reality he just got a wandering eye, and even though she's all that he could ask for he still wants to see what else is out there...
    I've been on both ends of the spectrum. I've done it but I also know how it feels so just some food for thought (for men and women)... We always think the grass is greener on the other side, but in reality grass is only green where it's watered and maintained so what you're probably looking at is artificial turf.

    I enjoyed this... Keep it up!

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  7. 'that women don’t ever know what they really want and seem to can’t ever make up their mind on what kind of relationship they want with certain men' Your right. I mean we know [ I know ] what I don`t want .

    Aww that was so great, and so fcking true . My [ highschool ] psychology teacher calls him , the nice guy . But I don`t think, wait yes I had one of those . . one of them was to obsessed with me, him and how he believes he so effin' different and how no one understands him. So I couldn`t let him get me because then I would have to be stuck there listening to something I didn`t want to hear; something that annoyed that hell out of me. And the other one, has a girlfriend now and he wasn`t much of a listener nor a speaker . So now I`m just sitting around, blogging . lmfaoo

    are you in a relationship ?
    you know a lot . ..

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